


i want you to love me like i do

by bigpapishownu



Series: i don’t need nobody else [1]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Established Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Jealousy, M/M, Miscommunication, Mutual Pining, Sex, crazy ex that wont leave ki alone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:20:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28078353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bigpapishownu/pseuds/bigpapishownu
Summary: five times kihyun missed the signs, plus one time hyunwoo literally had to tell him
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Son Hyunwoo | Shownu/Yoo Kihyun
Series: i don’t need nobody else [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2078397
Comments: 40
Kudos: 165





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: This is NOT real, it’ll never be real, and is just a figment of my imagination. No harm intended to anyone.
> 
> Now that that’s out of the way: 
> 
> This is my first kpop related fic, please be kind and leave any feedback you may have. I’m a new monbebe so characterizations may not be 100 percent but i will try my best to improve on the next one. 
> 
> Title comes from Monsta X’s Nobody Else because if a song is showki, it’s definitely that one.

**one**

Kihyun doesn’t drink a lot. 

He’ll only drink when he’s sad, which is probably something he needs to get checked out. It’s definitely not normal and definitely very unhealthy, but he doesn’t care - it’s all he knows how to do now.

But there’s just something about seeing Hyunwoo put his hands on a girl’s waist, pull her close, and whisper in her ear that just makes Kihyun want to drink until he loses all self-control. He wants to rip Hyunwoo’s hands off that girl, and scream at him, tell him that there’s no reason to dance up on some random girl when Kihyun is right fucking there. He’s been there for ten fucking years now and Hyunwoo still hasn’t noticed.

It hurts, but there’s really nothing he can do about it. Not unless he wants to ruin their friendship.

“You’re looking at him again,” Minhyuk screams, right in his ear. And yes, the music in the club is loud, but Minhyuk’s voice still carries over the music. “You promised yourself you would stop looking at him like that, especially when he’s with someone else. You have to keep your word or else, what good is it worth?”

“Shut up,” Kihyun says, annoyed more by the way Hyunwoo keeps sliding his hands further down the girl’s back than by Minhyuk. “I’m just making sure he doesn’t do something stupid. It’s the first time he’s been out, since, _her_. We need to keep an eye on him.”

“Well, yeah, I guess. But you don’t have to look like you want to fling the girl out the window either. She’s literally only looking hot as fuck and making a great pair next to Hyunwoo. Leave her alone.” 

Kihyun’s mad that Minhyuk is right.

He doesn’t tell him as much. 

“Whatever. I’m just going to leave now, I’m tired and tomorrow’s going to be a long day at work; I can already fucking feel it. Let everyone know that we’re still on for dinner at my place tomorrow.”

Kihyun takes the last sip of his cocktail like it’s a shot, downs it all and doesn’t grimace at the bitter taste it leaves behind. He grabs his jacket and throws it over his shoulder, waves goodbye to the guys at the table, and quickly makes his way to the exit. 

It’s much colder than when they first went in, so Kihyun puts his jacket on and zips it all the way to the top. His place isn’t that far away from the club, so he figures he’ll just walk there because calling a cab would take way longer than it’ll take just to walk there. The streets are quiet, only one other person on their midnight jog, but it’s nice. It gives Kihyun time to think, about nothing in particular, really. Probably just Hyunwoo. Again. Probably about Hyunwoo and how Kihyun desperately wishes he’d notice him, and notice the fact that Kihyun’s been in love with him for ten years now.

 _He’s never going to fucking notice,_ Kihyun thinks, _he’ll never notice and you’ll end up alone and in love with your best friend._

“I’m so fucking pathetic,” Kihyun says to himself, and pushes forward. 

His place is only two blocks away now. 

//

Kihyun’s halfway to being asleep when he feels someone climb into bed with him. He’s frozen until he feels two familiar, strong arms wrap around him and pull him close, Kihyun’s back plastered against their front. 

“Hate that you always leave without saying goodbye to me,” Hyunwoo says, his breath smelling like margaritas and beer. Before Kihyun can say anything, though, Hyunwoo’s rubbing his thumb back and forth over Kihyun’s lips. “Don’t you know that it makes me really fucking sad when you leave like that? Like I’m having the time of my life with you, and you just fucking dip. That’s not very fair.”

“You didn’t have to leave,” Kihyun says, very narrowly missing Hyunwoo’s thumb in his mouth. “You looked like you were having a lot of fun.”

Kihyun hopes he doesn’t sound as bitter as he feels. 

Hyunwoo laughs. 

“It’s not the same if the love of my life isn’t there.”

Kihyun sighs, they’ve been over this. Hyunwoo got into the habit of jokingly calling Kihyun _the love of his life_ and now he can’t seem to stop himself, especially when he’s drunk off his ass. 

“You need to stop saying that, someone might actually think it’s true,” Kihyun scolds Hyunwoo, not much heat behind it, really. “You need to learn to have fun with friends other than me, you know?”

“But there’s no one in the world that I want more than I want you,” Hyunwoo says, slurring his words even more, which means he’s probably about to fall asleep. “You should know that by now.”

“And you should too.”

The silence that follows is deafening, but Kihyun isn’t worried. Hyunwoo starts snoring softly, subconsciously moving closer to Kihyun, perfectly fitting himself against Kihyun’s body. 

_Goddamn it, I am so in love with you_ is the last thought Kihyun has before he falls asleep in Hyunwoo’s arms.

  
  
  
  
  


**two**

The year comes and goes by in the blink of an eye. It’s cliche as fuck, and Kihyun knows it, but there’s really no better way to describe how fast the year went by. The year passes by like nobody’s business, and before anyone knows it, it’s once again time to celebrate the upcoming new year at Kihyun’s place. It’s become sort of an unofficial tradition, but no one’s ever said anything about it so it’ll probably continue being that way for the future to come. 

“No, it’s ok, you don’t have to bring anything but yourself. I got this,” Kihyun says, trying to comfort Minhyuk once again. Something else that’s become another unofficial tradition; when eventually Minhyuk starts freaking out because he doesn’t know what to bring to the party. 

“But it’s not ok that you always have everything,” Minhyuk says, whiny. “We always come over to your place and never bring anything. Then we leave it a fucking mess and you end up having to clean all by yourself. It’s not fair.”

“You and Hyunwoo always stay up to help me clean.”

Minhyuk scoffs. 

“Ok, well, I’m going to bring something so awesome, you’re going to lose your shit,” he laughs, mischievous. “I promise.”

“Ok, I trust you,” Kihyun says, trying not to sound too sarcastic. “Well, I think I’m gonna let you go now. My potatoes look like they’re just about done.”

“Ok see you later.”

“Ok bye.”

Kihyun smiles and puts his phone back down on the counter. There’s always something with Minhyuk, but Kihyun never minds it; Minhyuk’s one of his best friends, so it’s never a burden. 

“You shouldn’t leave potatoes in the oven unattended for so long,” Hyunwoo says, letting himself in like it’s _his_ place, which, he’s over so often that Kihyun has started to think of his place as _their_ place. 

Kihyun’s even given Hyunwoo his own set of keys. 

There’s something different about this time though. Hyunwoo’s been staying here for at least a month now, sometimes sleeping in bed with Kihyun and sometimes sleeping in the guest bedroom. It feels weird calling it a guest bedroom now, though, because it feels more like Hyunwoo’s second bedroom more than anything.

There’s tension between them, Kihyun knows that both of them can feel it. 

“You should move in,” Kihyun says, not so much of a command but more of a plea. “We’re good together.”

Hyunwoo’s silent. For a second Kihyun thinks he’s fucked up, maybe said the wrong thing, but then Hyunwoo walks over to Kihyun and wraps him in a bone-crushing hug, rubs Kihyun’s back. Kihyun’s stuck in place for a second, until his brain catches up to what’s happening. He wraps his arms around Hyunwoo and tries to squeeze him back just as hard. 

Hyunwoo mumbles something right before he kisses Kihyun’s forehead, and steps back. 

“Ok, so what can I help with?”

//

Kihyun’s too far gone, screaming in Minhyuk’s face, that he doesn’t even feel Hyunwoo kiss the corner of his mouth when the clock strikes midnight.

  
  
  
  
  


**three**

Hyunwoo officially moves in a week after New Years. 

“It’s not too late to back out now,” Hyunwoo says, as he’s bringing the last box of his stuff from his old place into _their_ place. “I’m really glad we’re doing this, you know?”

Honey appears behind Hyunwoo,

“I’m really glad you guys are doing this too, you two were becoming insufferable,” he jokes. “It’s about time Hyunwoo stepped up and finally said something about whatever _this_ is.”

Before he can elaborate, Honey disappears into the kitchen, probably to grab a drink or those stupid round rice cake snacks he’s been really into lately.

They don’t say anything else.

  
  
  
  
  


**four**

The honeymoon period doesn’t last long.

At least, it doesn’t for Kihyun. He’s back to drinking when he’s sad, again. Hyunwoo’s back to dating and bringing back girls to their place, which isn’t a real problem because he’s allowed to do that - this is _his_ home now, it’s his home as much as it’s Kihyun’s. The problem is that Hyunwoo gives the girls attention that he should be giving Kihyun instead. 

Kihyun doesn’t have a right to get upset, though, not when he hasn’t told Hyunwoo anything about how he feels.

The sadness only gets worse when Hyunwoo keeps bringing back the same girl over the course of a month. She’s beautiful, long black hair that reaches down to her mid-back, and long legs that seem like they go on for literal miles. Kihyun supposes that if he was into women, this girl would be exactly his type. 

Maybe that’s why Hyunwoo seems so into her.

“Do you need help making breakfast?” a soft voice asks, and Kihyun doesn’t know he’s been staring until she continues, “I’m Seri, uh, Hyunwoo’s friend.”

“Oh, uh, sure. I’m very picky about how I work the kitchen, though, so if I’m being too naggy just let me know,” Kihyun says, trying his best to be friendly. She’s done nothing wrong, it’s not her fault that Kihyun’s best friend won’t notice him. 

“Don’t worry, Hyunwoo’s given me plenty enough warning.”

They laugh. 

“Yeah?”

“Oh yeah, he talks about you a lot,” she says, and Kihyun can’t quite place the tone to her voice. “Just tell me what to do, and I’ll be glad to help.”

//

Seri starts coming over more often, and Kihyun comes to find out that she’s actually pretty fucking cool and laid back. They bond over their mutual love of cooking and Hyunwoo’s messiness. 

“Like I’ll ask him to pick his shirt up off the floor and he looks at me like I’m speaking another language,” Seri laughs, Kihyun snorts a little. “Like I don’t think he understands that the dirty clothes hamper is red for a reason.”

“Back in college we also had a red hamper for dirty clothes but for some reason his favorite place to put them was on the bathroom floor,” he says, shaking his head at the memory. “We’ve been knowing each other for too long, I think, because I’ve just started picking up after him. Out of hating when the house is dirty more than anything.”

“How long have you guys been knowing each other?”

“Uh, wow, over ten years now. Met each other in high school and I haven’t been able to get rid of him since.”

Before Seri can say anything else, Hyunwoo walks in the room. His hair is everywhere, and if they were by themselves, Kihyun would fix his hair and clear the eye boogers from his eyes. It would be awkward now though, Kihyun doesn’t know how Seri would feel about him doing that, so, he just _doesn’t_.

“I heard noise,” Hyunwoo says, voice still raspy from sleep. “What were you two up to?”

Hyunwoo sits next to Seri and drapes an arm around her shoulders. Kihyun tries not to grimace, but it’s a very close thing. There have been many times they’ve sat like that, just drinking coffee in the morning, looking out the back in comfortable silence. 

Kihyun really wishes that was the case now. 

“Just talking about how you can’t seem to clean up after yourself, babe,” Seri says, scooting closer to Hyunwoo. “I feel bad that Kihyun’s been cleaning up after you for a long time now. I need to start teaching you how to clean up after yourself.”

Hyunwoo blushes. 

“Kihyunnie doesn’t mind,” he says, and points at Kihyun. “I drive us everywhere and he cleans. It’s good, we have a good thing going on. And besides, I’m not that bad anymore, not after Kihyun said he’d stop cooking breakfast if I didn’t clean the room.”

Kihyun laughs. 

“I am not that bad,” Kihyun says, still laughing a little. 

“I know,” Hyunwoo says, smiling so wide Kihyun can barely see the whites of his eyes. “That’s why I’m so easy for you.”

Kihyun doesn’t miss the way Seri tenses up beneath Hyunwoo’s arms. 

“Shut up, you don’t even know what being easy for someone means.”

//

Seri breaks up with Hyunwoo two weeks before his birthday.

It’s not a pleasant affair, but Kihyun tries to be there for him as much as he can. It’s not easy, it’s difficult watching Hyunwoo drink so much and not have sense of what he’s saying at all. 

“I think this is why you should just fall in love with me so we can get married,” Hyunwoo says, his head in Kihyun’s lap. 

They’re on the couch, watching nonsensical infomercials at 3 in the morning because that’s how Hyunwoo decided he wanted them to spend the rest of their weekend doing. 

“I don’t think you know what you’re talking about,” Kihyun tells him, rubbing Hyunwoo’s cheek with his thumb. “I think it’s time we go to bed.”

“Ok.”

Hyunwoo gets up first, pulls Kihyun up with him. They crash into each other, but Hyunwoo does a good job of steading them by holding onto Kihyun’s hips. They’re frozen in time, just looking into each other’s eyes like a pair of newfound lovers seeing each other for the first time.

“Can I sleep with you tonight?” Hyunwoo asks, quiet. 

“Of course.”

  
  
  
  
  


**five**

Kihuyn is right there when Honey meets Changkyun. 

So is Hyunwoo. 

“Oh, that’s going to be trouble,” Huynwoo jokes, wrapping his arm around Kihuyn’s waist.

They’re watching Honey and Changkyun from a distance. It’s sweet, really, because Kihyun doesn’t think he’s ever seen Honey act so shy around anybody before. Changkyun doesn’t seem to be much different, however, he’s having trouble meeting Honey’s eyes, talking with his hands in his pockets and looking at the ground.

“Does that remind you of anyone?” Kihyun asks, reminiscing about the time he and Hyunwoo met in the halls of their high school. 

“How could I ever forget someone like that?”

“You really should stop talking like that if you ever want to find someone, you know? Someone might think you’re into me and won’t want to get into anything with you.”

Kihyun doesn’t give Hyunwoo time to reply, just walks away to catch up with Honey and Changkyun.

He’s not going to put up with Hyunwoo saying shit like that anymore.

  
  
  
  
  


**plus one**

The tension is thick when they get in the car. 

“I’m getting really fucking tired of you telling me how I can and can’t feel,” Hyunwoo says, and it catches Kihyun by surprise. Hyunwoo’s never spoken to him like this before, and it kinda fucking sucks to be on the receiving end of it, honestly. “I’m fucking grown and you keep talking to me like I’m a child, and I’m just really sick of it. Unless we share the same brain, I don’t think you know how I really feel. So shut the fuck up and stop assuming.”

Kihyun’s left speechless. 

Neither of them say anything on the drive home.

//

“Listen I’m sorry,” Kihyun apologizes, as soon as they walk in the door.

Hyunwoo’s having none of it though.

“Whatever,” he says, and tosses the keys on the table. “Don’t wait up for me for dinner, I’m not hungry.”

//

Kihyun waits.

//

The tension eventually lessens, and they’re almost back on normal speaking terms again.

“I’m going on a date tonight,” Kihyun tells Hyunwoo over breakfast one day. It’s been over ten years, it’s really about fucking time he goes on a real date. “His name is Sungho and I met him on tinder.”

“I can’t believe you had to resort to the internet when I’m right fucking here Yoo Kihyun,” Hyunwoo tells him, almost slamming his fork down. “You have got to be kidding me. I’m here, I’ve _been_ here for over ten years, yet you had to go find some random stranger on the internet? You’re joking.”

“I told you that you need to stop-”

“And didn’t I tell you the same thing a few weeks ago? What did I say?”

Kihyun’s quiet, trying to get his heart to stop racing, else he feels like he might have a heart attack. He’s gotta be hearing things wrong, trying to find the wrong meaning in the things Hyunwoo’s saying. There’s just no way he’s hearing this right.

“Why are you acting like this?” Kihyun asks, quiet, unsure.

“Because I love you!” Hyunwoo says, like it’s that easy. “Because I have been in love with you for the better part of a decade. That’s why. And it’s been really hard trying all these years for you to notice me. I’m just getting ready to finally give up because there’s no way that you’d feel the same as I feel for you.”

Kihyun’s breath catches in his throat.

 _There’s just no fucking way this is happening_ , he thinks, _no fucking way_.

Hyunwoo gets up from his seat across the table and walks right in front of Kihyun, kneels right in front of him. He takes Kihyun’s hands in his own, squeezes them tight.

“Why do you think I’ve dated _once_ the _entire time_ we’ve been knowing each other?” Hyunwoo asks as he’s looking up at Kihyun. “Because I knew you were it for me from the first time I saw you. Even then I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life next to you, no matter as friends or different than that.”

Kihyun smiles, letting go of Hyunwoo’s hands just to put his hands on Hyunwoo’s face. 

“Please don’t be playing with my heart like this,” he begs. “I don’t think my heart could take this being a joke or a prank. Please.”

Hyunwoo kisses him, and it leaves no doubt in Kihyun’s mind.  
  



	2. i just wanna show you off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the next chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bc Nobody Else lives in my head rent free always this is the title of this chapter lmao
> 
> lowkey content warning for unsafe sex aka not using condoms or proper lubrication
> 
> i hope you guys enjoy
> 
> see content notes at the end for some news lol

Getting together doesn’t make a huge difference to their lives. 

Hyunwoo just moves all his stuff from his second bedroom to Kihyun’s bedroom, permanently. The house keys Kihyun had given him stop being the spare keys and become Hyunwoo’s set of keys. Kihyun’s car stops being just Kihyun’s and also becomes Hyunwoo’s, and vice versa. They stop sleeping in separate beds altogether, and only fall asleep when they’re next to each other. And that’s it, that’s all there is to it. 

“You really thought a lot was going to change, huh?” Hyunwoo asks one night, voice deep with sleep, like he just woke up. Kihyun guesses he’s been moving and making a lot more noise than he thought he was. “We have literally been living as if we were in a committed relationship for almost ten months now. What did you think was going to change?”

Kihyun just shrugs, he doesn’t know what to say. Hyunwoo doesn’t say anything else either, just pulls him close and falls back asleep.

Kihyun follows soon after. 

//

Hyunwoo’s refusing to let Kihyun get out of bed. Each time Kihyun thinks it’s safe to roll out, Hyunwoo keeps pulling him closer, tightening his arms over Kihyun’s chest more each time. It’s good, though, considering the fact that Kihyun wouldn’t dare dream of something like this a couple of months back. 

He’s living _the_ dream.

He likes to feel Hyunwoo’s light snoring against his back, likes being able to take Hyunwoo’s hands and kiss them over and over until he feels Hyunwoo wake up. 

“I’m just telling you this because you’re still half asleep, but,” Kihyun says, kissing Hyunwoo’s hands a couple more times. “But, I would not mind having these wrapped around my neck.”

That seems to wake him up.

They lay in silence while Hyunwoo’s brain catches up to the situation at hand.

“Are you hitting on me?” 

“I have been for the better part of a decade, but thanks for noticing.”

Hyunwoo laughs.

“I’m just saying, if you ever feel like having sex with me, I wouldn’t mind having your hands wrapped around my throat,” Kihyun says, like it’s nothing, because it isn’t. “Just think about it.”

Kihyun’s just trying to put something out there slowly so Hyunwoo isn’t completely taken aback when he brings it up. He knows Hyunwoo’s only ever been with women, so he figures the best way to know how Hyunwoo feels about it is to just bring it up casually every once in a while. 

There’s nothing wrong with that.

//

_“So this is it, huh?” Kihyun asks Sungjin, trying his best not to let his tears fall._

_Sungjin isn’t even looking at him, staring off way behind Kihyun. At what? He doesn’t know, doesn’t care to know. All he needs to know now is if their relationship is over for good, or if there’s anything they can do to salvage what’s left. Kihyun’s willing to do anything, and he’s sure Sungjin feels the same way._

_“This is it,” Sungjin tells him, and he’s looking Kihyun straight in the eyes again. “I think this relationship has run its course and there’s nothing we can do about it.”_

_“What do you mean? We’re doing so good, we’re great together. I don’t understand what you’re saying.”_

_Sungjin sighs._

_“I heard you talking to Jooheon about wanting to get married.”_

_Kihyun freezes._

_“I am not marrying you,” Sungjin continues, and it sounds mean, like he’s disgusted at the mere thought. “We’re only nineteen, and there’s no way I’m tying myself down yet. Especially not to someone like you.”_

_“But we’ve been together for seven fucking years! And even then, I didn’t mean that it has to happen now,” Kihyun says, crying now. “How can you say you won’t even think about it? Don’t you think you owe me that much, at least?”_

_Sungjin just scoffs and shakes his head._

_“I don’t owe you anything. You’re lucky I’m even dumping you in person.”_

_“And you’d be the luckiest person in the fucking world to marry someone like Kihyun,” Hyunwoo says, appearing out of seemingly nowhere. But really, he’s always had a habit of letting himself in Kihyun’s place, so it’s not much of a surprise that he’s here now._

_Hyunwoo moves Kihyun aside and steps in between them, almost nose to nose with Sungjin. They’re the same height, all of five foot eleven inches at only nineteen years old. They’re looking at each other with anger in their eyes, Kihyun can tell, especially by the way Hyunwoo’s flexing his jaw muscles and the way his fist is tight against his side._

_“Why don’t_ you _marry him then? If you’re so fucking sure anyone would be lucky?” Sungjin mocks, walking closer to Hyunwoo, so close Kihyun’s pretty sure everything they see is a blur. “I know you’ve always wanted him, so there you fucking go, you can fucking have him.”_

_“And so what if I’ve always wanted him? He’s not a fucking object, asshole. That doesn’t give you the fucking right to treat him like shit; he’s not your goddamn puppet.”_

_“What the fuck are you going to do about it?”_

_It’s silent when Hyunwoo steps back just enough to size Sungjin up._

_Kihyun can tell he’s running over what the consequences would be if he hits Sungjin. Not any of them severe enough, Kihyun guesses, because before anyone knows it, Hyunwoo’s raising his fist. Kihyun steps in front of Hyunwoo before it gets worse, puts his hands on Hyunwoo’s chest._

_“Please don’t,” Kihyun begs, doesn’t look Hyunwoo in the eyes. “It’s not worth it, just let it go.”_

_“And you fucking wonder why I don’t wanna marry you,” Sunjin says bitterly, like he has a fucking right. “This is another reason why. You’re always putting Hyunwoo over yourself."_

_“If you_ ever _try to contact Kihyun ever again, I’ll make sure you fucking regret it for the rest of your miserable life,” Hyunwoo says. “Now get the fuck out of here and never come back.”_

_Sungjin looks like he wants to say something else, but doesn’t. He doesn’t move either, none of them do - they’re frozen in time, just Hyunwoo and Sungjin staring each other down, like they’re daring the other to do or say something else._

_Hyunwoo is the first to speak:_

_“Just for the record, I_ have _always wanted Kihyun,_ we _have always wanted each other. For the life of me, I couldn’t figure out why he chose someone like you - an asshole with nothing to offer him. I guess now that you’re leaving I don’t have to know because I will make him happier than you ever could have.”_

_Sungjin scoffs, shakes his head like it’s a fact he’s always known. He finally walks away, slams his keys down on the table near the door._

_He turns around and says:_

_“Just remember, Kihyun, the way you found him is the way you’ll lose him. There’ll be someone better for him that comes along and he’ll leave your ass just like I’m leaving you.”_

_He walks out, walking out of Kihyun’s life forever._

_They never bring up Sungjin after that._

//

Kihyun’s out with Changkyun, on the hunt to get something for Honey for their one month anniversary. It’s cute and it makes Kihyun wonder if he and Hyunwoo are going to be like them, getting each other cute little presents for their anniversaries. 

**to Hyunwoo**

_im out with changkyun dont wait for us for lunch_

Kihyun puts his phone back in his pocket. He knows better than to expect a reply from Hyunwoo right away. 

But just as Changkyun’s checking out of the store they’re in, his phone starts buzzing in his pocket, probably one of the times Kihyun’s got lucky that Hyunwoo’s actually paying attention to his phone. 

**from 4895271016**

_hey i’ve missed you_

_you’re looking really good_

Kihyun’s blood runs cold - that number is etched in his brain forever. He stares at the phone in his hands, then looks around to see if anyone’s looking at him. No one looks suspicious, though, no one’s out of place so he decides to ignore the creepy message and put his phone back in his pocket. 

It starts buzzing again when they walk into the next store.

**from 4895271016**

_i suppose it’s my fault you forgot me_

“Changkyun, let’s go,” Kihyun says in a hushed voice, grabbing Changkyun by the hand. “Please.”

Changkyun must see the desperation in Kihyun’s eyes because he drops everything he’s got, and lets Kihyun pull him out of the store. Neither of them say anything. They just keep walking, very narrowly avoiding all the people at the crowded mall - all the way to the parking lot, all the way to Kihyun’s car.

“Why are you running from me?” an all too familiar voice asks, seemingly just as out of breath as Kihyun and Changkyun. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

Sungjin starts approaching them; a piece frozen in time, still looking the same as he did when they were nineteen, except more well built. 

“You better fucking leave before I start swinging,” Changkyun says, right as he puts himself in front of Kihyun. 

Sungjin just laughs, ignores Changkyun completely and talks to Kihyun again.

“It’s funny, I always thought you’d end up with Hyunwoo,” Sungjin says, taking a step back to look at Changkyun up and down. “I never knew you liked them younger, but he’s really hot so I can see why you’re with him. Nice upgrade.”

Changkyun tenses up when Sungjin starts walking closer. Before Kihyun knows it, Changkyun lands a fist on Sungjin’s mouth, right smack dab in the middle. It sends Sungjin stumbling backwards, not quite hard enough that he falls, but it’s a close thing.

“Oh, you thought I wouldn’t do it?” Changkyun asks, mocking. “Try me one more time, I don’t think you heard me correctly. Stay away from Kihyun or I’m going to crack your fucking skull open. Got it?”

Sungjin has no choice but to throw his hands up in defeat. 

“No matter how far you run, I’ll always find you,” Sungjin tells Kihyun, dabbing blood from his mouth with the back of his hand. “We’ll talk eventually. You can’t hide forever.”

//

“Please don’t tell Hyunwoo about this,” Kihyun begs. 

“But-”

“Trust me, just don’t.”

Changkyun just nods. 

//

Christmas comes and goes, and Hyunwoo still doesn’t know about the little incident that happened in the mall parking lot last month. 

Kihyun’s really thankful for that.

//

Hyunwoo only finds out because Kihyun’s very fucking drunk by noon on New Years Eve. But to be fair, everyone else is either drunk or on their way. 

They’re all sitting in the living room, playing some new game that had dropped the previous week. Minhyuk’s got a couch all to himself, because of course he does, he always does. Hyunwoo is pleasantly slotted between Kihyun and Changkyun, an arm around both of them, and Honey is sitting on the floor, in front of Changkyun.

“There’s nothing I hate more than hiding stuff from you,” Kihyun whispers, putting a hand on Hyunwoo’s thigh. “I just don’t want you to think that I went look for it, because I really didn’t. He’s the one that found me and wouldn’t leave me alone.”

“What are you talking about?” Hyunwoo asks, worried. 

“Sungjin.”

Kihyun closes his eyes and lays his head back. 

He can feel Hyunwoo tense up.

“What?”

“He- he was at the same mall Changkyun and I were at last month, I guess, and he- he saw me,” Kihyun says, swallows hard. “He followed us to the car.”

Hyunwoo scoffs.

“Why didn’t you call me?” Hyunwoo asks, still tense. “I guess my warning went in one ear and out the other. I’m going to find him and I’m going to make him regret he ever contacted you again.”

“What would you have done? He probably would’ve left by the time you got there anyway, there was no use in calling you. Besides, Changkyun landed a nasty fist on his mouth. Made him bleed a little.”

Kihyun chuckles a little at that last bit.

“Listen, I don’t know who that guy was,” Changkyun says, eyes fixed on the tv. “But he was being an asshole and Kihyun looked really upset so I had to do something about it.”

“Thank you,” Hyunwoo says, pats Changkyun’s shoulder awkwardly.

Only silence follows.

//

Telling Hyunwoo about the whole Sungjin situation isn’t the best idea, apparently, because it throws his whole mood off the rest of the night.

//

“I’m sorry,” Kihyun says, looking down at Hyunwoo as he’s taking off his shoes. “I- I don’t want to see him again, I promise. He’s the one that found me and followed me.”

“I know,” Hyunwoo says, calmly. “Arms up.”

Kihyun obeys, lets Hyunwoo take his shirt off and put on a more comfortable one. Hyunwoo’s gentle with him, slowly fits the t-shirt over Kihyun’s head and helps him put his arms through the holes when one of Kihyun’s arms get stuck. He cradles the back of Kihyun’s head when he helps him lay down, so he can help Kihyun change into some shorts. 

Hyunwoo disappears for a second, then comes back with a glass of water.

“Drink this.”

So Kihyun does.

“I didn’t mean to ruin our first New Years together, I’m sorry,” Kihyun says, apologetic. “I _will_ make it up to you I promise.”

“It wasn’t your fault, it’s ok.”

Kihyun doesn’t say anything then, just lets Hyunwoo pull him up to his side of the bed. He joins Kihyun after he changes into his favorite pair of red shorts and takes his shirt off, just tosses it over his shoulder like it’s nothing. He manhandles Kihyun so that Kihyun’s head is on his chest, hugs him tight and kisses the top of his head. 

“We don’t have to keep talking about this if it stresses you out this much, you know?” Hyunwoo asks, kisses Kihyun’s head once more. “I trust you completely, and I know you’re telling me the truth. I don’t doubt you for one minute.”

//

Kihyun’s walking to his car after work, smiling at the cute selfie Hyunwoo took of them during Changkyun’s birthday party. He’s so enamored by Hyunwoo’s smile in the picture that he doesn’t notice someone following him, doesn’t even think anything is out of the ordinary until he tries to open the car door, and an arm is stopping him.

“Hey, what the-” Kihyun starts, but is interrupted.

“I told you we would talk eventually,” Sungjin says, calm as if he’s done nothing wrong. “Either we talk now, or I can call you for a meeting tomorrow. I know how busy you are lately and I know you can’t afford meetings right now.”

“What the hell are you talking about? You don’t even work here, so go away before I call the police.”

Sungjin laughs. 

“Well, then, I guess you’ll have to explain to them why you’re calling the cops on your own boss.”

Kihyun’s blood runs cold. 

“Oh? Did my lovely Kihyun forget we majored in the same thing?”

“Why are you doing this?” Kihyun asks, no, _begs_ to know an explanation. He feels tears start to well up in his eyes; he’s so frustrated and scared when he really shouldn’t be - they’re not 19 and wondering about the future anymore. “You’re the one that left. You’re the one that said you didn’t want to be with me anymore. You’re the one that chose to walk out. _Why_ are you back?”

And it’s the first time Sungjin’s looked truly guilty in a while. 

“I fucked up bad, babe, I really did,” Sungjin says, walks closer to Kihyun. “But you have to understand me. Seeing you be closer to Hyunwoo than you ever were to me, made me think badly of you. And then to have it confirmed, god, I fucking lost it.”

Kihyun doesn’t move or flinch so Sungjin cups Kihyun’s cheek in his hand; it’s an odd feeling but Kihyun’s body reacts nonetheless. He closes his eyes and just focuses on how warm Sungjin’s hand is. Kihyun misses the good times together, but they were really nothing compared to how he feels when he’s with Hyunwoo. 

Slowly, Kihyun removes Sungjin’s hand from his face and looks up at him. 

“Well that’s too fucking bad,” Kihyun says, and takes his keys out of his pocket, unlocks his car. “You’re way too late now. I’m still very much in love with Hyunwoo and there’s nothing you or anyone can do to stop it. So, please, stop being fucking pathetic and leave me alone. If you look for me again, I’m not holding back - I will fucking end you.”

Sungjin’s quiet. 

Kihyun pushes Sungjin out of the way and gets in his car, locks the doors and drives off. 

//

He’s crying by the time he gets home. 

“Shit, Ki, are you ok?” Minhyuk asks, he seems to be the only one in the house. He all but runs to Kihyun, checks him out like he’s making sure Kihyun’s not injured. “Babe, look at me. What happened?”

Kihyun tries his best to calm himself enough to speak, but it feels nearly impossible.

“It’s ok, let’s get you settled down. Come here, slow. Come.”

Minhyuk walks him over to the couch and sits down with him. Kihyun is kinda inconsolable at the moment, so all Minhyuk can do is hug him close and let him cry. 

“It’s going to be ok, baby, you’re going to be fine.”

//

Kihyun ends up falling asleep on top of Minhyuk.

“And this is my boyfriend Kihyun, who’s asleep on top of his best friend Minhyuk,” Kihyun hears Hyunwoo say, which wakes him up. 

Hyunwoo is apparently introducing him to two of his colleagues he’s been talking about bringing over for a whole month. One of them is tall, a little taller than Hyunwoo, and thin. He’s got long black hair that Kihyun thinks would look terrible on him but makes the guy look like a model. And he is very, _very_ handsome. The other guy is shorter, but built as fuck. His hair is blonde with dyed blue ends, it makes his already cute face look even cuter. 

Kihyun gets up and tries to straighten himself out as much as he can. 

“I’m Hyungwon,” the taller man says, extends his hand out for Kihyun to shake. 

“You’re really fucking handsome,” Kihyun says when he’s shaking his hand. “I’m Kihyun, nice to meet you.”

Hyungwon blushes when he smiles, shy.

“That’s what I said the first time I saw him. Although, I don’t think I’ve stopped saying it since,” the shorter man says. “I’m Hoseok.”

Kihyun shakes his hand. They both laugh. 

“I’m glad you’ve all established that the man is handsome but do you have to be so loud?” Minhyuk’s voice comes from the couch. 

He gets up and stretches. 

When he opens his eyes, all he can say is:

_“Oh.”_

They all laugh.

“I am in love with both of you,” Minhyuk says, completely serious, and Kihyun can tell he’s being truthful. “Lee Minhyuk, completely and fully at both of your services.”

//

Dinner goes well. 

Minhyuk flirts with Hyungwon and Hoseok all evening, and eventually gets their numbers before they leave. He gushes about them for about an hour after they leave, until he gets tired and announces he’ll be staying in the guest room.

“And please, if you guys do something: don’t be too loud,” Minhyuk jokes, winks at Hyunwoo before he disappears into the guest bedroom. 

Kihyun laughs, but Hyunwoo doesn’t.

“Do you even think about me like that anymore?” Hyunwoo asks, sounding genuinely curious. “I- just, we’ve never done that before and I think you’re getting bored with me.”

The sudden confession makes Kihyun sad, he wonders why Hyunwoo would even think something like that. He hopes his actions haven’t been those that would give Hyunwoo that idea, that intention. Kihyun really hopes none of his actions have come across like he’s getting bored of Hyunwoo.

“What makes you think that way?” Kihyun asks. He makes Hyunwoo look at him, grabs him by the waist and turns him completely towards him. “Like I could ever get bored of you; I’m in love with you. I’m willing to wait as long as it takes - I waited _ten years_ to be with you, I can wait ten more. And if it never happens, then I’ll still be just as in love with you.”

“It’s not even that I don’t want to, I want you so fucking bad, you have no idea,” Hyunwoo says and closes his eyes. “But, I don’t know, I don’t think I have earned the right to see you like that.”

Kihyun hums. 

“Well, we don’t have to do it all at once, y’know. We can take it slow and only do as much as you feel comfortable with; you know I’ll never push you further than that.”

Hyunwoo opens his eyes again, but there’s a different look this time, a dark look. It gives Kihyun chills, but he doesn’t move or back away. Instead, he walks closer to Hyunwoo, until their chests are nearly touching. 

It’s exhilarating.

“Don’t tease me like that,” Hyunwoo says, right before he wraps his hand around Kihyun’s throat; Kihyun swallows hard. It’s electric. “I could take you apart right here right now, and you wouldn’t even know what hit you.”

“Then why don’t you? You know I’m so fucking easy for you, baby, I can drop to my knees right here right now if you want me to.”

Hyunwoo just kisses the breath out of Kihyun.

“Goddamn it, you’re so fucking hot. One day I _will_ do you all over this house.”

“Can’t wait.”

//

Hyunwoo starts getting bolder after that.

He’ll grab Kihyun’s ass while he’s making food, will hug him from behind and rub his chest. He’ll kiss Kihyun’s neck when Kihyun’s brushing his teeth, starts saying _mine_ whenever he’s kissing any part of Kihyun’s body. 

It drives Kihyun insane.

//

They’re making out on the couch one afternoon. Kihyun thinks they’re making pretty good progress, progress that at least will end up in handjobs. Or so he hopes.

Hyunwoo’s about to take his shirt off when someone bangs on the door.

“Not the right fucking time,” Kihyun mumbles. “It’s always something, huh?”

Hyunwoo laughs.

Kihyun gets up to answer the door, frustrated as hell because they were finally about to get somewhere.

It’s Minhyuk.

“Wow, that hickey is massive. How are you ever going to cover that up?” he asks as he’s coming in. He probably doesn’t really care about the answer because he continues, “Anyway, that’s not what I’m here for, like at all. I- oh my god, I just got asked out. By a couple. Like both of them. At the same time.”

It’s the first time either of them have heard Minhyuk talk about anything even remotely related to dating. As far as they know, Minhyuk’s never dated in his life. Flings, one night stands, sure. 

Kihyun isn’t really sure about what this could be, however.

“Our Minhyuk is growing up,” Hyunwoo says, like he’s very proud of the fact. 

“I’m going on a date with two people at the same time, that’s wild.”

It finally clicks in Kihyun’s head, who Minhyuk is talking about. 

“You’re going out with Hoseok and Hyungwon?!” Kihyun asks, shocked. “Like both of them.”

Minhyuk nods proudly.

“Nice.”

//

It’s like Minhyuk is determined to be the cockblock of the century, because just a week after interrupting them, he does it again. 

“I am going to murder him if he does that one more time,” Hyunwoo groans, helping Kihyun to his feet. “I think he can sense it, and he’s determined to stop us. I don’t even know how that’s possible.”

Kihyun laughs but goes to get the door anyway. 

“If it’s not life threatening, Hyunwoo’s going to murder you,” Kihyun says as soon as he opens the door. “And I’m going to help him hide the body.”

To his credit, Minhyuk does look a little guilty.

“I’m kidding. What’s up, babe?”

Minhyuk brightens up and comes in. 

“Guess who has not one, but two boyfriends now?” he asks, proudly. “Me.”

“You need to let me in on your secrets,” Kihyun says, as seriously as he can without laughing. He doesn’t want to make fun of Minhyuk, but instead, he just wants to facepalm himself. “How did you pull two beautiful men in a single day, but it took me _ten years_ to work up the courage to admit my feelings to Hyunwoo?”

“And even then,” Hyunwoo laughs. “I did it first.”

Minhyuk smirks and shakes his head. 

“Nope,” he says, still smirking. “A true gentleman never reveals his secrets.”

//

Minhyuk’s secret is that he’s fantastic to be around - he’s charming, good looking, and funny. Kihyun himself would have fallen for him if he hadn’t been so wrapped up in Hyunwoo for the past decade.

//

Kihyun always cooks dinner for them. 

He doesn’t mind at all because Hyunwoo’s always at the table trying to find songs that remind him of Kihyun. It’s sweet, even when they both start singing completely off key. Kihyun loves hearing Hyunwoo’s voice, even on a bad day, because it’s just so comforting and soothing. 

Even when he’s upset or angry, he never raises his voice. 

“I’m going to quit my job,” Kihyun says while he’s making dinner one night. “I don’t think it’s a good fit for me anymore, so I want to look for something different.”

It’s quiet, except for the sound of the rain outside. 

“You’ve been there for almost five years,” Hyunwoo finally says, like he can’t quite process what Kihyun’s trying to say. “Are you sure?”

“I’m completely sure. I don’t ever want to go back there, ever again.”

“Did something happen?”

Kihyun doesn’t answer, just furiously concentrates on stirring the broth for the soup he’s making. He can feel Hyunwoo staring at him, waiting for an answer. He can keep waiting, Kihyun thinks, maybe he’ll grow bored eventually and start talking about something else. Just have to keep holding on enough for Hyunwoo to let go.

Of course, it doesn’t happen like that. It never does.

Kihyun closes his eyes when he feels Hyunwoo’s hands grip his own, making him let go of the spoon. He doesn’t open his eyes even when Hyunwoo spins him around, doesn’t even look at him when he tilts Kihyun’s face up to meet his.

“He’s my fucking boss,” Kihyun says, defeated. “My old boss quit two months ago, and I was told I would be considered for his position, but nothing ever came of it. Well, he fucking found me. He fucking found me and got the job that was going to be mine.”

Everything seems to click in Hyunwoo’s mind when Kihyun opens his eyes again. 

“I am going to kill him,” Hyunwoo says through clenched teeth. “What the fuck is his actual fucking problem? I’m sure you’ve made it more than clear that you want nothing to do with him, but he’s still following you around? No, no, that isn’t going to work.”

It’s silent for a while before either of them speak again.

“Can you come with me tomorrow so I can turn in my resignation?” Kihyun asks, quiet. “I don’t think I can go alone.”

“I promise, as long as you want me, you’ll never have to do anything alone.”

//

Hyunwoo drives Kihyun to his job. 

The whole ride there, Kihyun’s silent, just staring at the window. He’s sad - his job was stable, brought in good money, and he knows how to do it so well now, he could do it with his eyes closed. He’ll miss his coworkers too, especially the office manager because he always shared his lunch with him; he’d been taking cooking classes recently, and was very excited to share what he’d learned with Kihyun.

“I hate that he’s ruining my life even after I gave him my everything for seven fucking years,” Kihyun says, picking at the skin on his thumb. “I don’t think he gets that I never want to see him again. What can I do to make myself more clear?”

Kihyun is inconsolable right now, there’s nothing Hyunwoo can really say that’s actually helpful, so he just listens to Kihyun’s rant. Kihyun starts crying right before they make it to his job, well, _former_ job now.

“I guess it was my fault that I wasn’t completely truthful to him ever since I met you, but still. Fuck. I was willing to make it work but then he started acting like a goddamn asshole. He’s the one that pushed me away, the one that said he didn’t want to be tied down to someone like _me_. What the fuck was that even supposed to mean? I was willing to put in the fucking effort to get over you, I was willing to make him the only one for me.”

“We’re here,” Hyunwoo says, and Kihyun feels bad because he didn’t realize he’d been the only one talking the entire time. “Do you want me to go up with you or do you think you can do it on your own?”

Hyunwoo doesn’t sound like his normal self, sounds a little off; Kihyun doesn’t comment on it. 

“I’ll, uh, I’ll make it quick,” Kihyun says, quiet. 

He doesn’t look at Hyunwoo before he gets out of the car.

//

His resignation is quick, thankfully Sungjin isn’t in the office. Most of his coworkers seem sad to see him go, but only the office manager cries with him when he gets in the elevator for the last time. 

“You’ll do well in life, son,” he says, pats Kihyun’s shoulder. 

Kihyun bows. 

“Thank you.”

//

The atmosphere is tense between them when he comes back - Hyunwoo doesn’t even look at him, just starts driving off as soon as he hears Kihyun shut the door. 

Kihyun can only guess what made Hyunwoo upset. 

“I’m sorry,” Kihyun apologizes. “I shouldn’t have said all that.”

“It’s fine,” Hyunwoo replies, short, maybe a little hurt. “I wouldn’t be a very good boyfriend if you couldn’t talk to me about these things, but you kinda did hurt my feelings.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

Hyunwoo’s silent for a while, Kihyun almost thinks he’s being ignored.

But then,

“I just, I- you kinda made it seem like _I_ was the reason why your relationship didn’t work out,” he says, gripping the steering wheel so tight his knuckles are almost white. “I would just hate to be the reason why things didn’t work out with someone you were with for so long. God, you guys were together for almost a fucking decade. And it was _me?_ It was because you were attracted to _me_ that all that fell apart? It just makes me feel so fucking guilty now.”

“I wasn’t just _attracted_ to you, I _fell in love_ with you,” Kihyun says, hates that Hyunwoo is downplaying their initial connection. “It had been so long, it had been literal _years_ since things weren’t right between me and Sungjin; we just got too comfortable with each other to leave. And then you came along. The piece of me that I didn’t know I had ever been missing, my sunshine, my fucking soulmate. Of course things were bound to fall apart the way they did. I’m just mad that I didn’t realize you felt the same way sooner - you never gave me any indication.”

Hyunwoo laughs, and it catches Kihyun off guard. For a serious conversation, he didn’t expect for it to have such a comedic tone for his boyfriend.

“I don’t know how you didn’t, honestly,” Hyunwoo says, back to his normal tone of voice. “Minhyuk and Honey always teased me for the massive crush I had on you, and they were not very casual about it either.”

Kihyun smiles, this is all so stupid. Arguing about a person in the past that doesn’t even matter. Someone that can’t seem to take a fucking hint. 

“Well, how was I supposed to know? As far as I know, you’ve only ever been attracted to women.”

“It’s _because_ I’ve only been attracted to women, and I started treating you the same as them, that you should’ve caught a hint.”

They finally make it home. Hyunwoo turns the engine off and turns to look at Kihyun, his expression has changed, it’s softer now.

“If you’ve only ever been attracted to women,” Kihyun thinks out loud. “Then what attracted you to me? A lot of things are different between me and a woman. I don’t think I’m nearly as beautiful.”

“I know it’s going to sound extremely corny, but, for me, it was your personality,” Hyunwoo says, completely honest. “You’re just _so_ confident and just did not care about what people think of you, as long as you feel good with yourself. And, I don’t know, suddenly I started noticing how that confidence started making you look really handsome. Then one day, I just, I started noticing how beautiful your eyes are when you smile. And how cute your mouth looks when you eat, and how your smile makes my heart stop. You slowly became the most beautiful person I had ever seen in my entire life. You became my everything.”

Hyunwoo tilts Kihyun’s face towards him, and smiles. 

Before he can say anything,

“I really want you to kiss me right now,” Kihyun says, looking down at Hyunwoo’s lips and back up at his eyes. “But I’m afraid if you start kissing me right now, I won’t want you to stop.”

“Then we won’t.”

Kihyun feels chills down his body.

“Are you sure about that?”

“I have never been more sure about anything in my life.”

Part of Kihyun wants Hyunwoo to jump in the backseat with him, wants to be with him right then and there. The other part, however, wants to take it slow to make sure Hyunwoo _really_ wants this. If they do this, they’ll be taking a step in a different direction than they have in the past. Sure, Kihyun’s been with another man before, and he’s enjoyed himself for the most part. Hyunwoo, on the other hand, Kihyun doesn’t know how Hyunwoo will really feel after seeing him undressed and undone like that.

Hyunwoo doesn’t really give him a chance to respond, he just gets out of the car and walks over to Kihyun’s side. He opens the door and helps Kihyun out, walks hand in hand all the way to the front door. 

Hyunwoo is all over Kihyun as soon as they lock the door behind them. 

Neither of them waste any time, especially not Kihyun. He starts taking Hyunwoo’s shirt off when he steps back to admire Kihyun, swollen lips and all. He quickly untucks it from his pants, thankfully Hyunwoo gets the hint and puts his arms up. Kihyun struggles a little to get it off so Hyunwoo has to help him. 

Kihyun doesn’t wait, he immediately drops to his knees in front of Hyunwoo.

“I think this might be my new favorite angle,” Hyunwoo says, rough. 

He runs his thumb over Kihyun’s lips, once, twice, three times. The fourth time, however, he pushes his thumb inside Kihyun’s mouth, massaging Kihyun’s tongue so he gets the hint. Kihyun catches up pretty fast and starts sucking on Hyunwoo’s thumb, looking up at him through his eyelashes.

Kihyun almost whines when Hyunwoo pulls his thumb out.

“You’re killing me,” Kihyun says, out of breath. “Do you think your thumb is going to be enough? I want to taste _you_ , _all of you.”_

Hyunwoo groans. 

“Say that again, babe.”

Kihyun smirks, satisfied that he seems to be getting to Hyunwoo. He makes sure to make eye contact with Hyunwoo when he says,

“Let me fucking taste _you_ now.”

“Again. Tell me what you want, what you need.”

Kihyun doesn’t say anything, just keeps eye contact with Hyunwoo as he unbuttons his pants, keeps looking up at him when he pulls his pants down.

He makes sure Hyunwoo really wants this, one more time.

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

Hyunwoo smirks, before he says, 

“If you ask me that one more time, I’m going to have to throw you on the bed and show you how much I want it.”

That catches Kihyun’s attention. 

“Well, in that case,” he says, pulls Hyunwoo’s pants up before he gets up. “Maybe we can discuss this further in our room?”

“That’s a very good idea, babe.”

Hyunwoo lets Kihyun go first, wraps his arms around him from behind. Kihyun can _feel_ him and it finally hits him that after ten years of waiting, _this_ is finally happening. He’ll finally get to really feel what it’s like to be with Hyunwoo, to feel what it’s like to become one with him. There’s nothing he’s ever wanted more than that.

When they make it to the room, Hyunwoo turns their attention to the vanity mirror. 

“You see this?” he asks, wraps his hand around Kihyun’s throat, tighter than before. “This belongs to me. It’s only ever belonged to me, and it will only ever belong to me. Do you understand?”

Kihyun nods.

He can feel himself melting in Hyunwoo’s arms. It probably won’t take long for him to get past his tipping point, if Hyunwoo keeps talking to him like this, if Hyunwoo keeps touching him like _this._ It’s maybe all the build up, all those years of dreaming about Hyunwoo touching him like this, all those nights _thinking_ about Hyunwoo talking to him like this. 

The anticipation will really be the end of Kihyun.

“You don’t know how many nights I stayed awake thinking about something like this happening,” Kihyun confesses, making strong eye contact with Hyunwoo. “About those fucking arms pressing me close to you as you fucked the life out of me. I would be a liar if I said that wasn’t my constant thought.”

Hyunwoo takes the opportunity to press Kihyun closer to him, making Kihyun’s eyes shutter closed.

“Yeah?” he asks, slowly guiding them to the side of the bed. “Keep telling me about everything; I want you to tell me every single thought you had about me.”

Kihyun’s about to say something when Hyunwoo starts undressing him. He keeps his eyes closed when Hyunwoo takes his shirt off and slides his pants off, audibly gasps when Hyunwoo starts tugging at his underwear. Kihyun stays in place when his underwear falls to the floor, only kicks them aside. 

It’s only when Hyunwoo lays him on the bed that Kihyun opens his eyes. He has a pretty good view of Hyunwoo standing at the foot of the bed, can see how his muscles work when he pulls his pants down. The eye contact they share when Hyunwoo takes his underwear off could be enough to light an entire city on fire.

“I didn’t say you could stop talking,” Hyunwoo says. 

He kneels down at the foot of the bed, pulls Kihyun closer to him, puts each of Kihyun’s legs on each of his shoulders. He starts kissing around Kihyun’s inner thigh, working his way up; he only stops when he can’t hear Kihyun say anything.

“I can’t hear you baby.”

Kihyun doesn’t make a noise because he’s afraid he’ll ruin the vibe, so he stays quiet. Then, Hyunwoo bites his thigh, really digs in which makes Kihyun scream, loud. 

“That, that, I,” Kihyun says, trying to catch his breath. “I liked that. Can you do that again, please?”

Hyunwoo doesn’t have to be told twice; he immediately bites Kihyun’s other inner thigh, sucks on it hard enough to leave a mark that’ll surely last for at least a week. 

“Yeah? Tell me what else you like, baby,” he says, licking over the mark he just made. “Tell me what you thought about me doing to you. I want to hear _everything_ you have ever thought about me, about us.”

Kihyun’s brain isn’t working right, _can’t_ work right, not when Hyunwoo spreads his ass and licks just outside the edge of his rim. He gasps and grips the bed sheets so hard his knuckles turn white. His breath catches in his throat when Hyunwoo spits directly on his hole and licks the spit right out. 

Hyunwoo does this again and again. Kihyun’s only option is to focus on Hyunwoo’s hands reaching for his, linking their fingers together.

“There, don’t stop,” Kihyun whispers, feels Hyunwoo smile against him. 

Hyunwoo pulls back far too quickly for Kihyun’s liking. It’s only when he’s settling himself between Kihyun’s legs, that Kihyun realizes what’s happening. He spreads his legs a little wider so Hyunwoo fits more comfortably. 

It’s the first time Kihyun has seen Hyunwoo so worked up like this.

“I love you,” is all Kihyun can think to say. “I love you, I love you, I love you, I love-”

Kihyun is interrupted because Hyunwoo slips his middle finger inside him. It’s been so long that it takes a while for Kihyun to get used to the feeling, but soon he’s rocking along to the rhythm of Hyunwoo’s finger. And then Hyunwoo’s kissing him, swallowing all of Kihyun’s moans, bites Kihyun’s lip when he slips another finger inside Kihyun.

“I- I want to fuck you so bad right now,” Hyunwoo says, rough, against Kihyun’s neck. He’s breathing hard and Kihyun’s unsure how long either of them will last, but there’s nothing more he’s ever wanted. “Please, can we?”

“Yes, yes, please.”

Hyunwoo slips in slowly, all Kihyun wants to do is grab Hyunwoo’s face and kiss him. So, he does, grabs him and basically smashes their faces together. 

Kihyun wraps his arms around Hyunwoo when he’s all the way inside, moans Hyunwoo’s name in his ear. 

Then. 

Hyunwoo’s fucking him, slamming in all the way, cutting off anything and everything Kihyun’s trying to say. It doesn’t take long for either of them, though, because then Hyunwoo’s grabbing Kihyun’s dick in his hand, pumping it at the same rhythm he’s fucking into Kihyun.

Hyunwoo fills him up quick, has him leaking out the sides. Kihyun’s cum is all over his stomach, sticky and warm. 

“So, uh,” Kihyun begins, still on cloud nine. 

Hyunwoo interrupts him again:

“We should get married,” he says, slowly pulling out of Kihyun. 

He disappears immediately after, comes back with a wet washcloth and wipes Kihyun off, careful of his sensitive areas. 

Kihyun’s quiet, just listens to Hyunwoo’s breathing - his brain hasn’t even finished processing what Hyunwoo just said. As much as he’d fantasized about the very thing Hyunwoo’s suggesting, he always thought it would take Hyunwoo much longer to arrive at that. But, still, Kihyun isn’t sure if Hyunwoo’s really sure about wanting to marry him or if it’s just what he likes to call post-nut niceness. 

So he asks. 

“We should do what now?” 

“Get married.”

He helps Kihyun get up; Kihyun has to lean on Hyunwoo a little because his legs are a little weak. They walk to the bathroom, presumably for a much needed shower. 

Neither of them say anything in the shower, and nothing while they’re getting dressed. 

“So what do you think?” Hyunwoo finally asks when they’re getting in bed. “I really want to make your name Son Kihyun.”

“Then we have to call our parents,” Kihyun says, yawns. “I would hate for none of them to be here when we do.”

“So is that a yes?”

“Of course it’s a yes.”

//

Kihyun’s a little sore the next day. 

There’s no other way he’d rather feel, however, because it means he had a good time last night. 

He feels around for Hyunwoo, expecting to land a hand on his chest, but instead feels around an empty bed. All Kihyun wants right now is to lay his head on Hyunwoo’s chest and cuddle up close to him, listen to Hyunwoo’s heartbeat in his ear. Hyunwoo probably snuck out while Kihyun was more towards his side of the bed than at the center. 

Sneaky. 

There are rose petals everywhere when he comes out of their room, candles on every table. And then, Hyunwoo standing in the middle of the living room, holding his hands behind his back waiting for Kihyun to walk closer. 

Kihyun walks slow, eyes solely focused on Hyunwoo’s. 

“I- you didn’t have to do this,” Kihyun says, struggles to get the words out because he’s afraid his voice will crack. 

“I did have to do this,” Hyunwoo replies when Kihyun’s finally standing in front of him. “I didn’t ask you properly last night, like you deserve. And I can’t go another minute knowing you’re not mine forever. I need to know.”

Tears well up in Kihyun’s eyes when Hyunwoo gets down on one knee. He starts full on crying when Hyunwoo grabs his left hand and kisses it. 

“There are people meant to be in your life for only a second, people that are supposed to come and go quickly. Fortunately for me, you are not one of those people in my life - like I told you I knew from the moment I saw you that I knew I wanted you to be in my life forever. You are the most important person in my life and there’s nothing no one can ever do to change that fact. You have my heart, you have my life, you have my _everything_ and you know it.”

Hyunwoo takes a red box out of his back pocket with his free hand, not breaking eye contact with Kihyun at all. He opens it to reveal a simple silver band with very fine engraving on it. 

“I just want to be by your side through all the hard times, through all the difficult times, and mostly, through all the happy times,” he continues. “You know I have always loved you, _will always love you_ until the end of time. So, please, do me the favor and marry me. There’s no one in the world I would rather wake up next to for the rest of my life than you, my best friend and soulmate.”

“Y-yes,” Kihyun barely says, so overcome with emotion. “Of course I’m going to marry you. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone in my life. Yes.”

Hyunwoo’s hands shake when he takes the ring out of the box, lets the box drop to the ground, and immediately grabs Kihyun’s hand again. He carefully slides the ring onto Kihyun’s finger and gets up. He looks Kihyun in the eyes before he kisses him, grabs Kihyun’s face so that they’re completely pressed together. 

Kihyun can only grab at Hyunwoo’s shirt. 

“I am so in love with you,” Hyunwoo says when they finally pull back. “I can’t believe we’re going to spend the rest of our life together. I love you.”

“And I love you.”

//

They call Kihyun’s mom first. 

Kihyun’s the only one on screen when the call finally connects. Suddenly, he doesn’t know why he’s nervous, can only smile awkwardly when his mom scolds him for not calling sooner. 

“And I know you’re a grown man, but you can’t expect for a mother to ever stop worrying about her child,” she says with tears in her eyes. “You haven’t called me in over six months and now you even video call me? Do you expect my heart to be still?”

“I’m sorry mom,” Kihyun says, and really, he is. He’s been so caught up in his life away from his family that he almost forgot about them. “A lot has been going on and I just didn’t want to bother you with my troubles.”

“Yoo Kihyun, I have raised you to know better. You are a part of me, you are my child and nothing you could ever tell me would be burdensome.”

They’re silent for a while. 

Maybe something like this should be told in person, Kihyun thinks, it’s something important that he wants to be able to tell to a person face to face. After all, it’s what his mom deserves. 

“I called because I wanted to tell you something really important,” he says, swallows hard. “But now that I think about it, it would be better if I gave you these news in person. Can you make it out next week?”

His mom is quiet for a while, examining Kihyun’s face carefully. 

She nods, “Of course.”

“Great, I’ll send you the ticket information and everything soon. I’ll call you soon, ok? Hyunwoo’s waiting for me to go to lunch.”

She brightens up. 

“Let me say hello,” she says, still smiling. “I bet he’s still as handsome as ever.”

Hyunwoo is a little awkward when he takes Kihyun’s phone. 

“Hello, Mrs. Yoo,” he says, politely. “How have you been lately?”

“I’ve been well. How about you? Still working on renovating your home gym?” 

Hyunwoo sneaks a glance at Kihyun. 

“Actually, uh, I moved in with Kihyun a while ago. So no home gym yet. Not unless I get Kihyun’s permission, of course.”

“Yoo Kihyun you better give your lovely friend here permission to build his home gym. You wouldn’t be a very good friend if you don’t want him to stay in shape.”

They all laugh. 

“Ok, mom I will call you later,” Kihyun says, smiling still. “I promise.”

//

Hyunwoo’s parents are in love with the idea of visiting their son, so they immediately agree to fly out the next week. 

//

They come to the conclusion that they want to tell their parents first, so they don’t tell any of their friends. Unfortunately for them, Kihyun has no filter the more he starts drinking. Sure, he can hold his alcohol pretty well, but loses it after a long night of drinking. 

Case is that he’s well on his way to get blackout drunk during Hoseok’s birthday party.

Halfway through the night, Kihyun needs a little help finding the restroom. Thankfully, Minhyuk’s always been his saving grace. 

“Minnie, _Minnie,_ I love you,” Kihyun says, struggling to unbutton his pants. “I love you so much, I don’t think you have any idea.”

“I hope this isn’t you confessing to me,” Minhyuk jokes. “Because I love you and all, but I already have two someones.”

Kihyun shakes his head. 

“No, no, I mean you are my best fucking friend and I love you so much for that.”

Minhyuk laughs a little. 

“What’s this all about, huh?”

“I want you to be the best man at my wedding,” Kihyun says, lands a heavy hand on Minhyuk’s shoulder. “I want you to be next to me when I marry the love of my life, y’know? I want you to be there.”

“Don’t know why you’re asking me so far in advance, but ok,” Minhyuk says, like he doesn’t get it at all, and maybe he just doesn’t. 

Kihyun shakes his head again. 

“No, I don’t think you get it. Hyunwoo proposed to me last week; we’re getting married for real and I want you to be my best man because-”

“Wait, hold on, Hyunwoo did what now?

“He proposed to me last fucking week. We’re getting married, like, spending the rest of our lives together married. And I know what you’re probably thinking: we haven’t been dating for that long, why would the next logical step be to get married? Here’s why that doesn’t matter - we’ve been in love with each other for over a decade.”

Minhyuk doesn’t say anything, just laughs and shakes his head in disbelief. He looks happy, though, at least that’s what he looks like to Kihyun.

Kihyun doesn’t know if they say anything else.

//

_Kihyun hasn’t gotten out of bed in over a week._

_There’s nothing else he wants to do anyway. He sits in the dark, staring at the wall like it holds life’s biggest mysteries, hoping it’ll give him the answer to why Sungjin didn’t want to be with him anymore. And he knows, really, he knows that their disagreement on marriage played a big role when their relationship fell apart, but they’d been doing really well up until that point. Kihyun had been working extra hard on getting over Hyunwoo, and Sungjin seemed to have been really appreciative of the fact._

_Part of him feels thankful that they figured this out before they spent more time together, but there’s another part of him that wishes they had more time to really think about it together._

_It’s not fair, Kihyun thinks, it isn’t fair that someone he’d been with so long no longer felt the same way about him. But then again, it wasn’t fair for Sungjin either; it had been many years since Kihyun felt the same way he did when their relationship started. He’s selfish for wanting to stay in a relationship that fell out a long time ago just because he was comfortable in it, and he knows it._

_Still, it hurt like hell._

_He’s deep in thought that he doesn’t notice Hyunwoo come in his room until Hyunwoo’s standing next to him, close enough to smell him apparently._

_“You fucking stink,” Hyunwoo says, pinching his nose with his fingers. “Come on, let’s get you in the shower. This isn’t good for you.”_

_Kihyun doesn’t say anything, just lets Hyunwoo pull him out of bed. He doesn’t even say anything when Hyunwoo starts undressing him and helps him in the shower, only says something when Hyunwoo turns the shower on and cold water sprays on him._

_“You could have at least turned on the water before you got me in here,” Kihyun complains, actually upset over the cold water. “That would have been really fucking nice.”_

_“Well, how was I supposed to know that you would actually let me get you in the shower? I haven’t heard you come in here in a week.”_

_“You could have fucking asked. I’m not a child.”_

_“You sure are acting like one right now,” Hyunwoo says, pours some shampoo on Kihyun’s head and starts scrubbing. “You need to wash away the stink because we’re going out today. We’re having a nice fucking dinner and then going to see a movie, and I don’t care if you don’t want to because we’re doing it anyway.”_

_Kihyun doesn’t say anything, just lets Hyunwoo finish washing his hair. It doesn’t feel awkward when Hyunwoo starts washing his body, doesn’t feel awkward when he wraps Kihyun up in a towel and helps him back in the room._

_“Where are we going anyway?” Kihyun asks, watches Hyunwoo dig in his closet and pull out random pieces of clothing to put an outfit together. “Why can’t we just order take out and rent a movie or something. I think I would like that better.”_

_“Why? So we can be done and you can just go back to bed?” Hyunwoo asks, a black t-shirt in one hand and another hand on his hip. “No, you need some fresh air and that’s final.”_

_And just like that, Kihyun listens._

_\--_

_In hindsight, letting Hyunwoo drag him out to dinner is the best decision Kihyun could have made in that moment, in that state of mind._

_It’s also the worst because he realizes just how in love he is with Hyunwoo._

//

Kihyun’s the first one to wake up after Hoseok’s party. 

The house is a mess, bottles everywhere, both empty and full. He feels really bad leaving without cleaning up, so he does. It takes him a while to find bags to put trash, but finds them under the sink in the kitchen. He’s about ten minutes into cleaning the living room when he hears someone walk in. 

“I didn’t think you would be awake so soon,” Minhyuk says, hair crazy everywhere. “You were the one that drank the most; I hadn’t seen you drink so much in years. I’m surprised you’re still alive.”

“Barely,” he replies, setting the bag down near the coffee table. “Why are _you_ up anyway? You weren’t that far off from me, either.”

“It’s my week to make breakfast.”

Minhyuk walks away and Kihyun just watches him, it’s the first time in a while he’s seen him truly happy. It makes his heart warm and full.

He follows Minhyuk to the kitchen. 

“You’re really happy aren’t you?” Kihyun asks, smile wide on his face. “You’re a very happy and positive person in general, but I don’t know, ever since you started seeing them, you just radiate a different type of happiness. I am very happy for you.”

Minhyuk smiles, shy. 

“Just as I am for you,” he replies as he’s getting a pan out of the cabinet. “Like look at you. Living with the love of your life _and_ engaged. Took you ten years, but you finally fucking did it. I am so proud of you.”

Kihyun freezes. 

“Wait, who is engaged?”

“You silly, you told me last night. Hyunwoo proposed you like last week, no?”

He groans. 

“I shouldn’t have drank so fucking much,” Kihyun says, presses the heel of his hands into his eyes. “I told Hyunwoo we would tell our parents first, but I guess I fucked up, huh? Well, can you keep this a secret for now, please?”

“You don’t have to ask me twice,” Minhyuk laughs. “My lips are sealed.”

//

“Don’t hate me, but last night I told Minhyuk about our engagement,” Kihyun tells Hyunwoo when they’re on their way back home. “I guess I was more messed up than I realized.”

Hyunwoo laughs.

“It’s ok,” he says, lightly pats Kihyun’s thigh. “Our parents will be here soon anyway, we can tell everyone else then.”

//

They drive in separate cars to the airport.

Kihyun’s mom cries as soon as they hug. She reaches up and fixes his hair, kisses him all over his face then hugs him again, tighter this time. 

“Look at my baby, all grown up,” she says. “I missed you so much, my baby.”

“I missed you too mom,” he says, trying his best not to cry. “Let’s go say hello to Hyunwoo and his parents, ok?”

Seeing Hyunwoo hug his mom makes Kihyun melt away. 

//

Kihyun makes dinner for them.

//

They’re all hanging out in the living room after dinner, sipping on some wine, enjoying each other’s company. Hyunwoo’s parents are sitting next to Kihyun’s mom on the bigger couch to the left of the smaller one Hyunwoo and Kihyun are on.

“I bet you are wondering why we flew you out here,” Kihyun begins, sneaking a nervous glance at Hyunwoo. “Uh, we- we live together.”

Hyunwoo takes Kihyun’s hand in his, intertwines their fingers together on his lap.

“We’re getting married,” Hyunwoo says, and Kihyun’s thankful for that. “We wanted you guys here so we could tell you in person, because it didn’t feel right to just say it over the phone.”

It’s quiet. And for a second, Kihyun thinks their parents are upset.

Then,

“I knew you guys would end up together eventually,” Hyunwoo’s mom says, tears in her eyes. She’s gripping her husband’s hand tight, maybe for stability, for comfort. “Kihyun’s good for you. You’re good for each other.”

“I’m glad my Kihyun finally found someone that loves him,” Kihyun’s mom says. “Someone that he trusts, someone that’s good for him. I know you guys will be very happy together, I just know it.”

//

Their parents leave almost as quickly as they came.

//

Minhyuk looks way too smug when they tell the rest of their friends. 

“Wait,” Honey says, shocked. “You knew? And you didn’t tell us? No hints or anything? You really are good at keeping secrets.”

“I’m the best, baby.”

//

Things only go up from there. 

Kihyun gets a new job.

He doesn’t hear from Sungjin again.

//

They set their wedding date for a month after Hyunwoo’s birthday, something simple, only the people they love with them.

Buying the rings is another story. Hyunwoo is very specific about what jewelry he wears on his hands, so it takes them a long time. The texture is always wrong, it’s always too cold, always too tight. 

Hyunwoo finally picks out the most typical yellow gold wedding band, asks them to engrave each other’s names on the inside. 

They’re perfect.

//

“But I don’t want to sleep without Hyunwoo,” Kihyun whines, and he’s a little tipsy, sure, but he’s telling the truth. “He’s so warm and I’m so cold.”

“It’s literally the middle of the summer, babe,” Minhyuk tries to reason. “Besides, it’s traditional for people getting married to sleep apart the night before. Distance makes the heart grow fonder or whatever.”

“That doesn’t make any fucking sense, it’s one night.”

Minhyuk rolls his eyes. Kihyun goes with him anyway.

//

“Kihyun, you have to get up now,” Minhyuk says, shaking him awake. “It’s time for you to start getting ready.”

“What time is it?” Kihyun asks, stretching as much as he can without giving himself a cramp. “I don’t have to start getting ready until 1pm anyway. I have plenty of time to sleep.”

“What time do you think it is? Let’s go, you don’t want to be late to your own wedding, do you?”

//

Their ceremony begins at three in the afternoon.

Their backyard gets transformed into the most beautiful place Kihyun’s ever seen, even if it’s really simple. Kihyun’s mom walks him down the makeshift aisle, down to the makeshift altar where Hyunwoo’s already waiting for him. Honey’s standing behind Hyunwoo, Minhyuk directly across from them. 

They’re both looking at each other, waiting for the ceremony to start. 

“I don’t know if you guys noticed,” Minhyuk whispers. “But you guys didn’t plan for a minister to officiate your wedding.”

Realization dawns on Hyunwoo’s face, and it would be hilarious if Kihyun wasn’t feeling the exact same way. 

“I guess perfect people do fuck up, huh?” Hyunwoo asks, laughs at the blunder they find themselves in. He turns his attention to their friends and family, “Well, I guess we forgot to bring in a minister to officiate the wedding. Is anyone here ordained?”

No one says anything, they all just look around in hopes that someone is.

“Wait,” Kihyun says, remembering the conversation he had with Changkyun wanting to become ordained just for the hell of it. “Changkyun, babe, did you ever get ordained like you wanted? Remember that one time you told me at dinner? I didn’t know if you were serious.”

Changkyun looks surprised Kihyun’s asking _him._

“Oh, uh, yeah,” he replies, swallows hard. “But this is your wedding, you should have someone that’s qualified.”

Kihyun shakes his head. 

“You’re one of our best friends. Why wouldn’t we want you to officiate our wedding? Right, babe?”

Hyunwoo nods. 

“We really want you to do this,” Hyunwoo agrees. “Do us the honor, please?”

Changkyun breathes in like he’s trying to calm himself, but eventually walks over to the altar and faces the rest of them.

“Uh, we’re all gathered here today to witness two people who love each other join their souls forever,” he begins, clears his throat. “To this day, I don’t think I’ve seen two people more perfect for each other. Except for me and Honey of course.”

That makes everyone laugh. 

“This isn’t about us, though, today is about Kihyun and Hyunwoo. Marriage is tough work, something like a plant, needs to be watered everyday to remain healthy. You need to love and support each other through everything, want to see each other succeed in everything that you do. I know you guys make each other very happy, please continue to do so for the rest of your lives.”

A slight pause. 

“Is there anything either of you would like to say before we continue?”

Kihyun nods. 

“I would like to go first,” Kihyun says, smiling shyly at Hyunwoo. “You make my knees feel weak, you make my drink feel stronger. You make my day brighter, you make me a better person. I knew from day one that you were the one I wanted to spend my life with. Never, never in a million fucking years - sorry mom - never did I think that we would be standing here today, getting ready to spend the rest of our lives together. I’m-”

Kihyun has to stop himself to wipe the tears running down his face. He hates when he cries because it’s really hard to gather himself. This is different, though, today he _has_ to compose himself. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t notice the love you had for me earlier. I’m sorry for all the hurtful things I said and did in the past, I promise I have changed and will continue to work hard to be the best version of myself I can be. I will work tirelessly to make you the happiest person in the world. You’re the love of my life, please don’t ever forget that. I love you.”

Hyunwoo’s eyes are watery, tears on the edge of spilling, something Kihyun can remember happening _once_ the entire time they’ve known each other.

He clears his throat before he begins. 

“The day I met you, I knew you were it for me,” Hyunwoo begins, looks at Kihyun like he’s an angel. “I have loved you every single day since. You have taught me countless things for which I will be eternally grateful to you. Our relationship is something new to me, but loving you certainly isn’t. Please don’t ever forget that I am in love with you.”

From there, it’s a blur. 

They walked down the aisle with their hands linked together. 

Kihyun’s never felt more alive. 

// 

Kihyun kisses Hyunwoo in the middle of the makeshift dance floor during their first dance. 

//

Hyunwoo falls asleep on the flight to their honeymoon, falls asleep again on the ride to their hotel.

They decide to go to the beach, far away from those they know. It’s not so much that they don’t want interruptions, but they just want a week away, just the two of them in their own world. No one else to care for but each other. 

“We’re here,” Kihyun says, shaking Hyunwoo. “You’re too heavy for me to lift you. Wake up, come on, get up. Please.”

“Oh, I’m too heavy?” Hyunwoo asks, stretching as much as he can in the confines of the car. “Alright, next time we’re in bed, you’re getting on top. I love seeing you under me but I guess I will have to make this sacrifice for you.”

It makes Kihyun blush and think of all the times they’ve already shared together. And can only think of all the things he still wants them to do. Kihyun only snaps back to present day when Hyunwoo settles a hand on his thigh, squeezing hard enough to get his attention. 

They go, Hyunwoo hugs Kihyun from behind in the elevator, all the way to their room. They probably look very fucking weird but neither of them care, they just got married and they’re still very much in love. 

When they get to their room, Hyunwoo just sits on the bed and watches Kihyun put their stuff away. 

“Have you ever made a sex tape?” Hyunwoo asks, watching Kihyun bend down to take his socks off. 

It catches Kihyun by surprise; he can’t help but laugh.

“What?” he asks, blushing a little. “Where is this question coming from?”

Hyunwoo shrugs. 

“I don’t know, we were showering the other day and I couldn’t help but imagine us in one. And now I can’t fucking stop thinking about it.”

“Have you ever made one before?”

Hyunwoo’s silent, scrubs his face. 

“I made one with Seri literally the day we broke up,” he says, like he’s embarrassed. “I guess watching the tape made her realize I wasn’t the one she wanted to be with. Her reason was that if the video ever got leaked she didn’t want people to know it was me. I don’t know why, but it’s ok. We weren’t meant to be and that’s that.”

“I made one with Sungjin the day we turned 18,” Kihyun confesses, drops his sock on the ground and sits next to Hyunwoo. “Then another one a couple of months before we broke up. I was impressed, actually, we looked and sounded pretty good, like professionals.”

“I bet we could make a better one.”

Kihyun thinks about it. Right now, all he wants is to enjoy himself with Hyunwoo then go to bed, doesn’t want the added pressure of performing in front of a camera. 

“Hmm,” Kihyun begins, trying his best to find the right words. “Maybe when we get back home, you can fuck me in front of the mirror and we can record that?”

Hyunwoo looks pleased.

//

They go to dinner and have a couple of drinks, get back to their hotel pleasantly tipsy. Unfortunately, there’s a line to use the elevator so they have to wait. Hyunwoo leads the way, of course, so Kihyun waits behind him.

**to hyunwoo**

_why is this line so long_

_dont they know i need you to fuck me_

_like we are on our honeymoon they need to hurry up so we can get to our fucking room oh my god_

Kihyun can see Hyunwoo struggle to restrain himself from turning around. 

**from hyunwoo**

_you can’t just be saying things like that_

_we’re in public_

Kihyun laughs, types out an answer just as fast as Hyunwoo sent his. 

**to hyunwoo**

_whatever_

_it’s not like youre not dying to see me on my knees_

**from hyunwoo**

_so what? are you going to jump me the second we get back to the room?_

**to hyunwoo**

_duh_

Before Hyunwoo gets the chance to reply, they’re at the front of the line. Three floors before theirs, just when they think they’ve got the elevator to themselves, the second most handsome man Kihyun’s ever seen gets on. He’s tall, a little shorter than Hyunwoo, but taller than Kihyun. He’s got a sleeveless black t shirt, tattoos all over his arms and most of his hands. 

“You guys from around here?” he asks, they both shake their heads. “Well, you guys should definitely make it into _Snakes and Shakes,_ the strip club down the street.”

He winks at Kihyun right before he gets off. 

“That guy was so fucking hot,” Kihyun says, laughs like he can’t believe he just saw someone like that. “I would let him fuck me ten ways to Sunday if you’d let me.”

The elevator dings just then, and Hyunwoo drags him out, grips Kihyun’s arm so tight it almost hurts. He struggles to get their room key, drops it at some point but doesn’t let go of Kihyun even then. 

If he’s being honest, Kihyun would do this more often to see the jealous side of Hyunwoo because it’s pretty fucking hot. 

Hyunwoo practically shoves Kihyun in their room.

“No one’s fucking you but me,” Hyunwoo says, rough. He grabs Kihyun’s chin and tilts his face up, forcing Kihyun to look up at him. “I don’t think you got it last time, but you belong to me and there’s no way in hell I’m sharing you with anyone. Do I make myself clear?”

Kihyun wants to dig, wants to press Hyunwoo’s buttons so deep he wants to see how far he’ll go. 

“You don’t own me,” Kihyun responds, defiant. “As a matter of fact, I’m going to go find him right now and suck his dick so good he’ll never want to let me go.”

Hyunwoo clenches his jaw so tight, for a second Kihyun’s afraid it might just pop. 

“On your knees. Now.”

Kihyun smirks. He’s accomplished what he wanted since they went out to dinner. 

“Yes sir.”

 _You don’t have to tell me twice,_ Kihyun thinks as he sinks down to his knees. He looks up at Hyunwoo when he starts unbuttoning his pants, licks his lips when he pulls them down. He grips Hyunwoo’s cock through his underwear, bites his lip to stop a moan when Hyunwoo groans. 

Hyunwoo throws his head back when Kihyun licks him through his underwear, shivering at the warmth of Kihyun’s mouth. He grabs a fistful of Kihyun’s hair when he takes his dick out, pulls a little when he feels Kihyun take him headfirst into his mouth. He bobs his head up and down, making sure to maintain steady pressure on the head of his cock. 

Kihyun pulls back with a loud pop. 

“I’m going to need you to fuck my face now,” he says, digging his nails into the back of Hyunwoo’s hips. “Don’t be scared, ok? I can handle it.”

And, he’s not lying. He’d been really good at it when he was younger and he’s been perfecting it ever since.

So. 

Hyunwoo does. 

He goes hard and doesn’t stop when he hears Kihyun choking. Hyunwoo only pulls back when he feels Kihyun dig into his hips. 

“Why did you stop? I told you I could handle it.”

“I want to kiss you,” he says, helps Kihyun up and pulls him close. 

Kihyun doesn’t take his time, just kisses Hyunwoo as hard as he can, wrapping his arms around Hyunwoo’s neck. Hyunwoo messes with his pants, pulls them down as much as he can while not breaking from the kiss. Kihyun pulls his underwear down right below his ass, goes right back to have his arms wrapped around Hyunwoo’s neck. 

Hyunwoo grips Kihyun’s ass, pushes their bodies closer together. 

“You need to quit being such a fucking tease,” Kihyun says against Hyunwoo’s lips. “You need to fuck me right now ‘cause if you don’t, I’m gonna fuck myself and force you to just watch.”

“That would be kinda hot, actually,” Hyunwoo replies, bites at Kihyun’s bottom lip. “Don’t tempt me.”

“You’d like that wouldn’t you? You’re so fucking dirty.”

“Only dirty for my husband.”

Objectively, Kihyun knows they’re married, have been married for almost a day now. But. Still. When Hyunwoo refers to him as his _husband,_ Kihyun feels like he might pass out. 

“You ok?” Hyunwoo asks, pulling back. 

“We’re _married._ Like, we’re going to spend the rest of our fucking lives together.”

Hyunwoo smiles wide, and starts kissing Kihyun from the top of his head. Gives him a kiss on the forehead, one on his cheek, one on the lips, two on either side of Kihyun’s neck; all the way down until it’s too hard for him to lean down. 

He takes Kihyun’s hand, then, and guides him to the bed. He lays Kihyun down and helps take his shoes, his pants and underwear off completely. 

“Take off your shirt for me, baby,” Hyunwoo says, rough. 

Kihyun listens, sits there and watches Hyunwoo do the same after he’s done. It’s really a show when Hyunwoo takes the rest of his clothes off, though, Kihyun just wants to eat him alive right then and there. 

“You’re so fucking hot and you know it,” Kihyun says, spreads his legs enough for Hyunwoo to fit. He groans when he feels Hyunwoo settle in. “How did I get so lucky?”

Hyunwoo doesn’t say anything, just spits in his hand and puts his hand between them, strokes himself a couple of times. 

“Baby, I want to have you right now, I can’t wait,” Hyunwoo says, and it comes out in one long rush, like it’ll kill him if he doesn’t. “Can I fuck you, baby?”

Kihyun can only nod, the desperation in Hyunwoo’s voice is almost enough to make him finish. 

Hyunwoo slowly starts to slip in, his cock tugging at Kihyun’s rim. It hurts, the drag, but once Hyunwoo’s all the way in, Kihyun knows he can get used to it - even more so when Hyunwoo groans his name in Kihyun’s ear. 

The rhythm is slow paced at first, letting Kihyun get used to the feeling. Hyunwoo knows Kihyun’s ready when he wraps his legs completely around him and tightens them around the ankles. Kihyun’s little gasps and moans are more than enough to send Hyunwoo over the edge. 

“I never want to fuck anybody else,” Kihyun moans, hands stroking up and down Hyunwoo’s back. “God, fuck- yeah, yeah, that’s it baby. Fuck me just like that, good. Yeah.”

They finish at the same time, looking deep into each other’s eyes. 

//

Ten years ago, Kihyun would have never allowed himself to even dream of something like this. Something so close yet so far, something within reach that was at the same time completely out of his hands. Hyunwoo’s always been his best friend, sure, but that friendship always had to stop somewhere. 

Now, though, now their relationship has evolved into something other than a friendship - something without limits. 

_Please don’t ever forget that I am in love with you._

As he lays on Hyunwoo’s chest, Kihyun knows he’s found his forever home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> follow me on @bigpapishownu on twitter
> 
> also the romantic sides are severely underdeveloped in this fic bc i lowkey have plans for a series in this universe so uh please be on the lookout for that coming here eventually lmao
> 
> the end was a bit eh bc i ran out of steam but im still pretty happy with it
> 
> i honestly dont know when i will write next bc this was a monster that just kept growing and uh yeah but feel free to suggest anything you would like to read

**Author's Note:**

> please let me know if there's anything you guys would like to read


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